Living Above The Norm

By no means do I consider myself an expert.  For all intents and purposes, I’m about as new a rookie Dad as you can find.  But this I do know: things in life are made with purpose.  As I shared when talking about …Life Purpose In 20 Minutes…, anytime that something is made or used without its purpose in mind, it will end up abused and broken.  I believe that people are made with purpose, too.  We spend a greater part of our lives looking for the thing that’s right under our noses.  This will not become a post about my newborn man-child, of whom I would rather watch than write about; but I do want to take the opportunity to share with you a thought from the heart of a father.  If you’re not a father, you may be one day.  Or perhaps, you have a father.  If you don’t know your father, our heavenly Father wants you to know He’s there.

What’s Been on My Mind

I’ve had the privilege to know many young couples over the years. Ours isn’t the first baby we’ve been around. It’s an experience like no other for everyone involved.  It’s amazing to me how such a joyous time for some can be such a stressful time for others.  Having a child (or positioning yourself to have a child) is a HUGE responsibility and one that should not be taken likely.  Things like insurance, doctors, money, vehicles, cars, beds, diapers, clothes, car seats, swings, bottles, toys, gadgets, classes, hospitals, and on and on, can mount up quickly and can catch a young mother and father-to-be by surprise.  Those who have had children understand this all too well.

I’ve known mom’s and dad’s that were now grandma’s and grandpa’s who felt overwhelmed with the burden of feeling the need to provide for their grandchildren because young mommy and daddy weren’t prepared, physically or emotionally.  What is supposed to be an enjoyable and monumental time in their lives is underlined by just a hint of “how is this going to work out?” In the back of our minds, we wanted to make sure we were prepared for all aspects of childbirth, at least as much as possible, and we prayed that this would be an enjoyable time for everyone in our lives.

The Preparation

I’m a planner.  I always have been.  Sometimes to my demise.  When it was time for our son to be born I was certain that I had it all worked out.  Sure, I might not know all the answers; but I was at least familiar with a few “veterans” who were more than willing to help in a pinch.  I knew she would do great in the delivery.  I knew he would be precious. I knew we had everything that was ever manufactured for sale at Baby’s-R-Us.  I knew how much the hospital and Dr.’s were going to charge.  But I had no idea what it would “feel” like to be a father.

My Greatest Revelation to Date

My son was born. He and Momma were healthy. All was well. I was now a Daddy.  But I didn’t really feel like one, at first.  But very soon I did.  It happened like this, first Kayla’s dad, and then my own:
“Son, do you need anything? Money? Help with the bills? Do you have everything you need? Is there anything Mom and I can do for you?”
“No, sir. Really. It’s all taken care of.”
Immediately, Josh McDowell’s definition of love leaped into memory. “To protect, and to provide.” I wasn’t speaking to my dad out of pride or a fear of him knowing where we were. I was speaking out of provision. With the Lord’s help, I had been able to provide for my family. For the first time (at least to me) I felt, “I am a father.”

Grace, Obedience and A Little Planning

I can’t take all the credit. Being a good father isn’t solely dependent on your abilities. The African proverb says it best, “It takes a village to raise a child.” I am who I am today because of God and others. There are people in my life that love me enough to tell me the truth. It felt great to walk down to hospital administration and write a check to pay for the balance of our delivery; no more medical bills. They saw dollars on a piece of paper – but i saw faithfulness, obedience, and the blessings of God.

Cole’s grandparents, friends, family, and the many, many others that were expectantly waiting his arrival are all now on cloud nine. This is truly a monumental time in our lives. We are blessed to be able to enjoy every moment. Don’t miss my heart here. It’s not the lack of the bills or the accumulation of stuff that makes me feel like a good Dad. It’s the heart and environment of trusting in the Lord that I’ve created in my home that makes me feel like I’ve provided. It’s having provided for my family that makes me feel like a father. Mom’s and Dad’s-to-be listen – with a lot of God’s grace, obedience to His word, and a little planning on your end bringing a child into the world is by far the most rewarding experience you will ever have.